{"id":1567,"date":"2014-04-27T16:30:46","date_gmt":"2014-04-27T20:30:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.usedtobeabastard.com\/?p=1232"},"modified":"2014-04-27T16:30:46","modified_gmt":"2014-04-27T20:30:46","slug":"17-undeniable-truths-parent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/dontpokthebear.com\/17-undeniable-truths-parent\/","title":{"rendered":"17 Undeniable Truths About Being A Parent"},"content":{"rendered":"
Life is messy, but parenthood is messier.<\/b> Thankfully, we can laugh our way through all the grubbiest moments of being a parent knowing that we\u2019re all In Ick Together.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n Because who needs TP when you\u2019re mostly just pooping on the floor?<\/p>\n<\/div>\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n The only predictable thing about being a parent is that it will get messy. Thankfully, we all experience the same small disasters; head to Clorox\u2019s website<\/a> today to laugh through life\u2019s messes.<\/big><\/p>\n Source:Buzzfeed<\/a><\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"1.<\/span> Gross smells are just part and parcel of everyday life.<\/h2>\n
2.<\/span> Sure, you\u2019ve seen things, but you ain\u2019t seen anything until you\u2019ve potty trained\u2026<\/h2>\n
3.<\/span> \u2026and it seems like the greatest miracle on earth when it actually works.<\/h2>\n
4.<\/span> Toilet paper will be used for everything except its true purpose.<\/h2>\n
5.<\/span> The annual science project is one of your greatest fears.<\/h2>\n
6.<\/span> Your child will use food for everything but eating.<\/h2>\n
7.<\/span> And vice versa.<\/h2>\n
8.<\/span> Feeding time ends like this so often that you barely react now.<\/h2>\n
9.<\/span> You consider it a complete success when the mess is contained to your baby\u2019s face.<\/h2>\n
10.<\/span> Seriously. This = success.<\/h2>\n
11.<\/span> This will be a two, sometimes three times a week occurrence.<\/h2>\n
12.<\/span> You will occasionally become convinced that every little mess is premeditated.<\/h2>\n
13.<\/span> There will be saliva, and it will be absolutely everywhere.<\/h2>\n
14.<\/span> You\u2019re just glad when they\u2019re not eating it.<\/h2>\n
15.<\/span> No playplace is a safe playplace.<\/h2>\n
16.<\/span> Never turn your back, not even for a second.<\/h2>\n
17.<\/span> And one must carry a tissue at literally all times.<\/i><\/h2>\n