If you haven’t heard of them yet, Phrosties were sugary, boozy frozen cocktails that would be delivered right to your door in unmarked plastic bottles that you’d order from a private Instagram account. Just as the Phrostie phenomenon took hold of New York City, the service has been shut down, leaving an entire population sober and thirsty.

In an effort to bring Phrosties to the masses (and get those masses super drunk) we experimented with a number of ingredients and flavor combinations to find the ideal Phrostie Phormula.

Because no one knows what the hell is in a Phrostie, we had to do some experimenting. We went around and grabbed the heaviest booze, the sugariest drinks, and the most artificial foods we could find. Besides, frozen drinks are much more exciting when each sip feels like you’re destroying part of your body. Below are the five combinations we came up with:

The Tropical Paradise:

The Fruity Tuesday:

The Capri Sunshine:

The Mango Madness:

The Extra Special Recipe: